The Cougar

The Cougar.(Or her younger sister)


She stoops to conquer. She is majestic and strong even at her age. A timeless beauty. She is everything you want. Maternal, matured, settled. You don’t have to worry about her throwing tantrums or begging for your attention. She will never worry you about money or whine about the bills. She seems just perfect. The above description could depict a woman who is in a relationship with a younger man.

Despite the permissive society we live in, dating a younger man is still frowned upon. Hence we’ve turned such women into sugar-mummies. I personally do not condone a woman marrying someone young enough to be her son( the boy might just not be mature enough to cope) but what about marrying someone a few years younger? Someone who knows where he is going and is planning on getting there soon. Why throw away a man with potential just because his birth date happens to be some months behind yours? I have never seen it written anywhere in the bible that a man must marry a woman that is younger than him but it appears if one tries to break that law then the person is breaking the eleventh commandment.
The main argument against not marrying a younger man is their lack of maturity. It is true that a lot of them are. But we must try to remember that not one size fits all. Not all younger men are immature. Not all of them want to marry an older woman just because she has more change in her pocket. The society is very harsh on women who date younger men assuming that most of the time the man is only in it for the money. They might argue that rich older women may see a younger man as someone they could control or dominate; they could see a young man as a project.
But, it could also be harsh on the men too. Men that date younger women may be referred to as gigolos or boy toy. Even if he becomes a success on his own, it would always be assumed that his wife’s money had something to do with it. He might never be respected or be seen as the head of his family. Some might try to make up for that perceived loss of ego by being unnecessarily cruel or harsh with their wives.
For those with a shorter age difference, say two years or less, the odds are that it will be easier to maintain an atmosphere of mutual respect. However, whatever be the case, being involved with a younger man is never a walk in the park. That’s why it’s important to examine motives for wanting such a relationship. To the man, will you be willing to date her without her money? To the woman, do you see the man as a project? What about conviction? Before taking any step in a relationship, it is important to be sure that you know exactly what you are doing. There are success stories of older women and younger men, although they are a few. I believe that these couples had something the other couples did not; the right motives and conviction.
The truth of the matter is, we are all looking for that special someone. But in order for us to find them, mustn’t we be willing to recognize them in whatever form they take? Be it older or younger, shorter or taller? The important thing is that we’re happy, right?
P.S: Let us know what you think in the comment box.

4 thoughts on “The Cougar”

  1. A younger man may have seen more of the world than an older woman, and he may be richer and more emotionally mature than she is. He should worry about other things. There are many reasons men prefer younger women, reasons men know, and those they are ignorant of. One thing a man that ventures into such union should take note of is this: there will be tough days, and the woman will rub your naivety and immaturity and lesser age into your face. It’s just part of being feminine. And what is a man with a bruised self-esteem in his own home? If you can’t overlook some irrational, inconsiderate, demeaning comments, you shouldn’t court, or marry an older woman.

  2. Hmmmmmn!
    I guess it’s non-acceptance could be traced to a mainly cultural stereotype.
    In addition, a woman who wants to go with a younger man should be able to answer within herself if she would be proud standing with him in public.

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